week 12: divorce.

This week in class we talked about divorce and how there are six different stages of divorce. In no particular order they are:

• Emotional Divorce: when the couple emotionally detaches themselves, they become less devoted
• Legal Divorce: when the courts decide the couple is no longer married
• Economic Divorce: this includes child support and spousal support
• Co-Parental Divorce: this is where custody is decided, legal and physical custody
• Community Divorce: one person loses friends and has to go make new ones by themselves, no more mutual friends
• Psychic Divorce: when the couple accepts that they are really, officially divorced

We also talked about how women are less likely to re-marry after being divorced and the reasons we though of for that are:

• kids: people may think that is too much, they don't want "baggage"
• time: being a single mom and having a job doesn't leave a lot of free time for a woman to go out on dates or even have a girls night, she is constantly being a mom
• guilt: if/when a single mom goes out she may feel guilty that she is away from the kids
• negative associations: new men to date could bring up bad memories or sad times from previous relationships

Hearing these things and talking with my classmates about stories and things we've seen in our own lives made me realize how common divorce really is. It also made me grateful for my parents and the fact that they've been together for so long and that they will be together forever.

week 11: parenting.

This week in class we talked about parenting and some helpful tips that we as future parents can incorporate into our parenting styles when we have children of our own. One of the more important things that I think we talked about were natural consequences and how they can teach children and how we should let them teach our children unless they are in danger, its too far into the future, or if others are affected by the actions of the child. Another thing is that when a parent politely requests something the child is more willing to cooperate. I have noticed that looking back on my childhood. When my parents asked me to do something in a nice way rather than telling me to do it, or yelling (which rarely happened) I was more willing to be obedient.
We also talked about the way children act (their mistaken approach) for something they need. This is an approach that Popkin's came up with. When a child is seeking for attention, it is usually because they need contact and belonging. When a child is rebellious, they are seeking power, they feel inferior to the authority in their life and they want to be more powerful. When a child is revengeful, it is usually because they feel like they need protection. These actions can be prevented if parents offer contact, give consequences, and teach forgiveness.